tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post4791247533872430070..comments2023-08-20T11:14:57.937+00:00Comments on Bisexuality and beyond: Bi lives: Nerina Shute/3Sue Georgehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-54825900220509821192015-03-18T16:36:20.389+00:002015-03-18T16:36:20.389+00:00Yes, I know. I have heard nothing from Maurice sin...Yes, I know. I have heard nothing from Maurice since that last post in 2012. Google yields no further information about him. Sad.<br /><br />I'd be very interested to know more about your Olivia Wyndham project.Sue Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-50148305537849947792015-03-17T22:28:46.746+00:002015-03-17T22:28:46.746+00:00what has become of Cocktails with Elvira and Mauri...what has become of Cocktails with Elvira and Maurice? an abrupt cessation, why? i'm working on Olivia Wyndham in Harlem MICHAEL HENRY ADAMSnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-36683594881886948752013-12-04T15:57:34.272+00:002013-12-04T15:57:34.272+00:00Hey sue. My name is Lacey I am a 16 year old bisex...Hey sue. My name is Lacey I am a 16 year old bisexual and I really respect what your blog is about I have a lot of respect for you please keep posting <br /><br />Much respectAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14552818917949210819noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-37857046472277888302012-10-29T17:24:17.112+00:002012-10-29T17:24:17.112+00:00Hello Sue. Yes I saw those books about ballroom da...Hello Sue. Yes I saw those books about ballroom dancing. I wonder if (for instance) the British Pathe archive/the National Film Archive has any films of Phyllis in her competition days? Obviously I could try to find out but it all takes time!<br />Regarding Passionate Friendships, as I know myself having a book published is one thing. Getting information about it to people who'd love to read it is quite another. (Of course it is very different since the internet.) It may well have been in bookshops but I didn't know it would be of interest to me. I hadn't heard of Nerina till around 2000 when I found out about (and then read) We Mixed Our Drinks in a footnote in a history book on the interwar period.Sue Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-32938964014875279432012-10-28T02:33:28.665+00:002012-10-28T02:33:28.665+00:00I don’t know if or why Passionate Friendships wasn...I don’t know if or why Passionate Friendships wasn’t well promoted. Nerina had lots of copies at her place when I stayed with her in Putney in 1995 and I think I saw them in bookshops then too. I googled Phyllis but mainly it was about the books on dancing. I think there is also some video of her dancing. On the 19th page I found the following from the London Gazette 2-3-1982 for some possible contacts.<br />HAYLOR, Phyllis Grace Hutton Wood Cottage, Whiteleaf, Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire, Dancing Teacher. 22nd October 1981.<br />Young Jones Hair & Co., 2 Suffolk Lane, Cannon Street, London EC4R OAU, Solicitors. <br />Personal representatives: James Wylie Patterson, Bruce Sheridan Christer, Judith Mary Hutton Yeates and Elizabeth Nerina Marshall.<br />Sue1066<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-5116359778533571422012-10-27T11:39:36.645+00:002012-10-27T11:39:36.645+00:00Sue1066, I'm so happy that you commented! I wo...Sue1066, I'm so happy that you commented! I wondered if you might at some point.<br /><br />I had tried (around 2008, when I was doing my masters') to get in touch with Nerina's last partner through an intermediary but nothing came of it. I haven't pursued her literary executor either (and thank you so much for letting me know about who she was) due to time and money factors. I do still hope to pursue my interest in Nerina at some point. I find her a really fascinating person, both as a writer and a character. I hope it doesn't sound too odd that I describe her like that, given that she is someone you knew and were related to.<br /><br />Do you have any idea as to why "Passionate Friendships" seemingly had no publicity at all when it came out? In 1992 I was searching desperately for any kind of book where anyone discussed bisexuality and I'm sure I would have seen it. And do you know if there is any footage online or anywhere of Phyllis Haylor in her ballroom dancing days?<br /><br />I have so many questions to which someone (obviously not you necessarily!) must know the answer.<br /><br />If you ever felt like getting in touch with me outside of this blog, I'd be so very happy to hear from you!<br />Sue (sues_new_email@yahoo.com)Sue Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-77350050290373545012012-10-27T01:53:57.959+00:002012-10-27T01:53:57.959+00:00Nerina Shute was the first cousin of my maternal g...Nerina Shute was the first cousin of my maternal grandfather. She told me she was leaving all her possessions (photos, papers etc too I imagine)to the family of Phyllis Haylor, her partner of the sixties and seventies so I presume this is what happened. Her final partner is a rather retiring woman and probably would not like to be contacted but I am still in touch with her. Sue1066Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-48219527094557710262012-03-17T12:23:53.833+00:002012-03-17T12:23:53.833+00:00Hello Maurice (who writes the great Cocktails with...Hello Maurice (who writes the great Cocktails with Elvira blog I refer to in these Nerina posts), good to see you commenting! <br /><br />Seeing male partners/husbands in this social status way is a late 20th century feminist view, but "making a good marriage" certainly wasn't. However, I am sure that neither Nerina nor Elvira saw their husbands/boyfriends in this manner. If anything, their choice of husbands and boyfriends (Elvira especially) shows them making very "bad marriages" indeed!<br /><br />Yes, I agree that it is very hard to find out more about that subculture. In fact, I found your blog by Googling Aimee Stuart. I thought someone must have posted something about her in the two years since I finished my MA. And you did! But no one else.<br /><br />It should theoretically be possible to discover where her papers are. I have the details of Nerina's literary executor, but haven't pursued it as yet.Sue Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-40433019875178553592012-03-16T18:03:08.451+00:002012-03-16T18:03:08.451+00:00Nice to see these pieces on Nerina.
I agree with y...Nice to see these pieces on Nerina.<br />I agree with you about the importance of histories. I think it's very risky to generalise across the generations. I may be quite wrong, but I don't think Nerina (and certainly not Elvira) thought about their male partners in terms of social status at all.I'm still trying to identify the sub-culture Nerina moved in and add a few names but I'm having real trouble finding material about Aimee Stuart etc.mauricenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-88225623075024372952012-03-12T01:17:39.708+00:002012-03-12T01:17:39.708+00:00That's a brilliant book, Rebecca. It seems ver...That's a brilliant book, Rebecca. It seems very clear from reading it that those more highbrow/serious/feminist writers mentioned in it were having similar emotional and sexual conflicts to those of Nerina and her friends. <br />Plenty of scope for lots more research by someone!Sue Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-18092282657909519962012-03-06T14:49:02.678+00:002012-03-06T14:49:02.678+00:00Thanks Rebecca. I will look for that book sharpish...Thanks Rebecca. I will look for that book sharpish! The British Library will have a copy, and it sounds like just the sort of book I wish I'd written...Sue Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-65598032167427996472012-03-05T19:42:19.221+00:002012-03-05T19:42:19.221+00:00Thanks for this series of posts, really interestin...Thanks for this series of posts, really interesting.<br /><br />Have you read 'British Women Writers 1914-1945: Professional Work and Friendship by Catherine Clay (2006) Ashgate, London? It's so much about the kind of things you're talking about here, that I looked Nerina up in the index, sure that she must feature. She doesn't, but you might find it interesting for comparison. (If you do want to look at it and have any trouble getting a copy, you'd be welcome to borrow mine).Rebecca Joneshttp://rememberingmyhat.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-6386077219266658712012-03-01T00:55:39.054+00:002012-03-01T00:55:39.054+00:00Disingenuous... I'm not sure it was that exact...Disingenuous... I'm not sure it was that exactly. In the part of her book where she talks about this, she sounds hurt and disappointed. It sounded more genuinely naive to me, because I didn't understand why she didn't get their objections.<br /><br />Regarding the contextual difference etc, it is far less usual to hear this now. But when I was younger (say in the 1970s), more bi people (men and women) used to say they felt a need for both male and female lovers contemporaneously. I think this HAS changed. I think there used to be much more of a feeling that men and women were profoundly different in their sexual feelings, behaviours, "essences" etc but I don't have any actual research that shows that. I think these are quite subtle changes in society that nevertheless do exist. Those are some of the reasons why I think histories of sexuality are so fascinating.<br /><br />And I don't care how old someone is, if they can write a book and have it published, their ideas can be argued with! I think Nerina was 84 when Passionate Friendships came out. She lived for another 12 years after that.Sue Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04682934707338626061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30566857.post-145725556696274972012-02-29T23:41:57.062+00:002012-02-29T23:41:57.062+00:00Nerina was disengenious when she wondered why &quo...Nerina was disengenious when she wondered why "having the best of both worlds" was frowned upon by lesbians. <br /><br />Lesbians are not talking about having male and female lovers when they say this-- they are talking about enjoying the loving of women, and benefiting from the social status of hetero relationships with men. <br /><br />In a word-- Duh. Although I would never argue the point with an 80 year old woman. <br /><br />Nerina may have felt a contextual difference in her beddings, between male and female partners, but as she found out, not everyone experiences the sexual energy exchange in the same way. Her husband didn't, and I doubt that many women, even of her acquaintance, did either. The sexulaity of women is not that simple.Stella Omegahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13301654872790964794noreply@blogger.com